This is the best advice I ever heard. Think about it! We are so often wanting to impress people that while they are talking to us we are thinking about what we want to tell them about ourselves. We don't care what they are telling us and we keep thinking hurry up and finish your story cause I have something really important to say, or worse we can't wait any longer, so we interrupt them mid-sentence because we have something we deem valuable to contribute to their conversation.
Most people could improve their active listening skills. What is Active Listening?
Active, effective listening is a habit,as well as the foundation of effective communication. Active listening intentionally focuses on who you are listening to, whether in a group or one-on-one, in order to understand what he or she is saying. As the listener, you should then be able to repeat back in your own words what they have said to their satisfaction. This does not mean you agree with, but rather understand, what they are saying. http://www.studygs.net/listening.htm
I know that I have been trying to work on my active listening skills and sometimes it's really hard when I don't want to forget what I want to say. I have this little trick that I use when someone is talking to me and I think of something I want to say. I just close my first and stick out my thumb. This is a subtle reminder to myself to hold that thought and allow me to keep listening to my companion. There is a downside cause sometimes the person you are having the conversation with just never stops talking and no matter what you can't get a word in! If you feel you have been an active listener and want a chance to speak up then wait for your companion to take a breath, say something indicating you have heard what they just finished saying and then say that reminds me...and begin your story!
If anyone has any other suggestions for stopping the narcissistic talker, I am all ears!!
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