Permission to be cranky!

WOW!

Was I ever in a foul mood yesterday (and not because it's Thanksgiving this weekend)!

Let me give you a re-cap...

I got out of bed thirty minutes earlier than usual because Sierra asked me to wake her up early for "picture day" at school and after three unsuccessful attempts she finally awoke, sat up and burst into tears. Somehow it was my fault she wasn't able to respond to my first, second and third gentle pleas for her to get out of bed.

Paul left the house a few minutes later giving me an abrupt kiss and half-hearted goodbye because his mood was affected by the girls fighting in the bathroom, both trying to get ready at the same time.

I managed to leave the house on schedule, dropped Jenna off at her school and then was stuck in traffic for 45 minutes making me late (again) for work. I guess most people aren't expecting winter driving conditions the first week in October.

By mid-afternoon my contacts were bothering me, I had a headache and skipped grabbing a healthy lunch because the near white-out conditions outside my office had put me off leaving the building until absolutely necessary.

Left work to pick up the girls (two stops, not one) and just as I was waiting for Sierra to come out to the car, I rubbed my sore eye enough to have my contact lense come out and fall to the floor.

I somehow managed to get both of the girls a snack, both of them to dance on time and myself safely home driving with one eye closed.

I walked in the door, stripped by the washing machine and put on the warmest, cozyiest and flannelest pajamas I could find. ( I am pretty sure neither of those are real words, but they seemed the best word choices for today)

When I finally sat down in front of the television....I gave myself full permission to be in a bad, bad mood.

I was mad at the weather, mad at all of the other drivers, mad at my kids and just mad, mad, mad!

I was still mad when I had to go get Sierra from dance and found out that she in fact had been offered a ride home and turned it down. It would have been really nice not to have to go out in my pajama pants, get into my freezing truck and spend another forty minutes driving to and back from the dance studio.

I considered calling Lauren to tell her about my terrible day, but decided I wasn't even in the mood to vent about my frustrations, so it was funny when at that moment Lauren called me.

Lauren and I don't often talk in the evenings, so when I whined about my terrible day and mentioned that I had decided against calling her she told me she must have known I needed to talk.

We did talk and after a half an hour of my moaning and complaining...I started to feel better. Thanks Lauren!

Where am I going with this story...

Well, we all have experienced days like mine.

We all get stuck in traffic, argue with our loved ones, and want to blame outside influences on our problems.This is normal and I think it's okay to give ourselves permission to be in a bad mood, but when this happens I think we need to set some parameters.

First, Admit you are cranky and decide how long you are willing to feel sorry for yourself.

Second, Take responsibility for your feelings and try to not let your bad mood affect others. This means when you are in a bad mood tell the people around you...it's you, not them, so they don't think they have done something to offend you.

Third, Indulge yourself! Reward yourself with something that will make you feel better. Book a massage, phone a friend, eat icecream. It doesn't matter as long as it makes you feel like you are doing yourself a favor. And...don't feel guilty! If your best friend was upset...you would offer to do something for her or him to make them feel better....be your own best friend and give yourself a lift.

Last, Re frame your thoughts. When your time limit is up, you must re frame all of the negative thoughts you were having into positive thoughts.

Example, last night I was thinking about money and debt and how it seems I never have enough money, so this morning I kept repeating to myself...My income is always increasing, I always am able to pay my expenses and I have a enough money to enjoy a comfortable life.

After spending a day thinking and focusing on the negative aspects of your life it's important to spend an equal amount time focusing on what's positive in your life and reminding yourself that it's important to be grateful for all of the wonderful things your have in your life...once you have spent some time being grateful and thinking positive, you will realize...that maybe things just don't seem so bad afterall!

Oh yeah, and it doesn't hurt to apologise to anyone who you think may have been affected by your negativity!

Just a thought!
Happy Thanksgiving!